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friendship

Why the Definition of “Friendship” has Changed?

Back in the day, your friend was someone in the neighborhood, a classmate or someone you saw (in person) on a regular basis. You passed notes in class, had sleepovers, and hoped you didn’t get a busy signal when you called them on their landline to make plans. You shared everything from clothes and gossip to your hopes and fears.

Today, the definition of friendship has completely changed, primarily as the result of social media and gaming. Today, it is entirely possible to consider someone living on the other side of the world, someone you’ve never actually met in person, a good friend. You share aspects of your life with them but usually after you’ve carefully filtered the pictures and removed any bad news from the post about your fabulous day. But are they really a friend?

A Broader Definition of Friendship

In the past, a true friend was someone with whom you didn’t mind sharing everything. The person you ran to after a breakup and celebrated with after a promising interview for your dream job.

In today’s world, anyone can be your friend, including that person you never really liked in high school, the neighbor you’ve only waved at once, and a friend of a friend of a friend…you get the picture. After all, the more social media friends you have, the better off you are, right?

The definition of friendship has become broader and increasingly vague. A friend isn’t necessarily someone you really know and see as a confidant. Instead, a friend can be any casual acquaintance, a person you’ve only met in passing. And, in the case of gamers, a friend can be a voice you know with a face you’ve never actually seen.

Friendship is a Word that Gets Thrown Around

As the role of friendships have changed so have the words to describe them. For example, the words “friendship”, “friend” and “BFF” are so often thrown around or used in hashtags that they’ve lost their meaning. At one time, calling someone your BFF meant they were your “go-to” person, the one who stuck with you when you were at the top, as well as when you hit the bottom. Now after spending one fun weekend at the beach someone may be tagged a BFF on social media when they know very few details about each other.

Sadly, friendship isn’t quite the sacred term it used to be. Anyone can be your friend. While it’s nice having social media and gaming friends there is an important question to ask. What do you do when you when facing life’s darkest moments or celebrating its brightest days? Whose door can you knock on or phone can you call at 3 AM knowing they’ll answer? That is when you need a real friend.

The Definition of True Friendship Hasn’t Changed

Be honest, many of your social media and gaming friends are nothing more than acquaintances. They may meet today’s broader definition of friendship, but they don’t meet the definition of true friendship. They’re never going to be that person you confide in. They’re not going to be that person you call in the middle of the night when you need someone to talk to. Instead, they are the “friends” you tell Happy Birthday or congratulate when they post about their latest amazing accomplishment.

Thanks to social media and the internet, friendships are evolving. However, true friendship remains the same, though it is becoming increasingly rare.

Now, who wants to be my Facebook friend?

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